The United Home-Owners Association of America

       Everyone online seems to be using readily understood ideas to represent more complex ones.  These are rarely appropriate, and always a gross over-simplification.  But hey, I'll hop right on that bandwagon.  I have a concept that is actually accurate however.  One that will explain why the two-party system is broken beyond repair.
       Imagine the entire country as a subdivision.  A tidy little 50 home neighborhood.  Each household has an average of 2 people.  Most have only 1, but some have many more.  Each house would be represented in the homeowners' association.  Each house would be voting for, and representing their best interests, while preserving common ground, (your rights) and collecting dues from members, (taxes) and compromising when it came to benefiting the neighborhood as a whole.  That is what the association rules (constitution) were written to represent.  That was the vision of the founding fathers.
       What we have now though, is a neighborhood ruled by warring street gangs.  Let's call them Dueces and Royals.  (In some neighborhoods this makes perfect sense).  Neither side represents the interest of any household.  Neither side is making the neighborhood any better.  The protection money extorted from you does not go toward preserving parks (your rights), it goes toward marking territory in the common areas.  The Dueces claim the territories (rights) they choose to represent, and the Royals other territories.  Since neither side can acknowledge the other's claim is valid without sounding weak, no agreements for the common good are ever reached, and the parks (your rights) are destroyed by tagging.  (claiming to represent your interests)
       The rules, (constitution) such as they are, become free-floating, and subject to popular whim.  Any attempt to stand alone, or to side with an outside gang, is met with bullying.  Try telling a hardcore Democrat or Republican you are voting third party.  They won't challenge you on a topic, or series of topics.  They focus on the fact that you will be "Throwing your vote away", or voting for the other side, who are always talked about as though they are evil incarnate.  You are either with us, or against us.  They attempt to bully you into wearing their colors.  The neighborhood, which was originally a nice place, becomes a dump; as neither side is interested in representing any individual household, nor the neighborhood, as a whole.
       And the only way to solve urban blight is to bulldoze the entire neighborhood, and start over.  This time with a fence (campaign laws that don't favor the two biggest parties) and a neighborhood watch. (active, informed voting against the two-party failure.)  You could also move, but the other neighborhoods are generally far worse.  The ones that are better have fewer public places, and higher association dues.

The "S" is for Stupid

       There is a methodology employed in Japan called "Kaizen".  It means improvement.  This methodology is tied to just in time delivery methods and the 5S method.  Many of you know Just in Time.  It means no storage, because your deliveries arrive; just in time.  It means only scheduled downtime for production equipment.  It works very well in Japan where the culture and laws support it.  No surprise, since it was developed there.
       It fails, often and spectacularly, here.  The reason is that; in Japan a late delivery has financial consequences for the people who did not fulfill it.  Here it is just another thing that happens.  No one is punished for late deliveries.  In fact, we don't even expect anything on time.
       The 5S method (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5S_(methodology) is the Japanese interpretation of your great-grandmother's advice.  "A place for everything, and everything in its place."  To see a work-space laid out in this method is quite impressive.  Again though, it works only in the right conditions.  Like in Japan.
       See in the factories, repair shops, and other businesses there, there are consequences to workers who fail shop inspections.  If there is something not in its marked place on a shelf, someone better have it in their hand.  If no one does, all are penalized.
       In America everyone's job is no one's job.  Apply that same standard and it falls apart quickly, because there is no penalization, nor any expectation thereof.  Instead of having one set of tools and equipment for all workers to share, we should focus on a uniquely American solution.  Or more precisely, medieval European.
       Modern union workers of all stripes can tell you the answer to this one without having to think about it, because they live it.  Each worker has their own set of tools, that they are financially responsible for.  Each worker will then take care of their equipment, and will keep track of it.  The only one who suffers when Bob loses his wrench is Bob.
       Now I wont say that this works in factories with multi-million dollar assembly robots, but that sort of thing is typically bolted down.  If it isn't, or if it is sufficiently specialist in nature, it can be signed out, and assigned to each worker, who will then be responsible for its care until returned.
       The short story is; that Japanese techniques work in Japan, because the laws, behaviors, beliefs, and social structure are what grew those very techniques.  They do not work here because we are not Japanese.  When we are forced to implement these techniques inappropriately, we do not suddenly become Japanese.  Although;
 I think I'm turning Japanese,
I think I'm turning Japanese,
I really think so.

Thanksgiving

       Not this time.  No politics.  No shopping advice.  Today is a history lesson.  We will discuss the first Thanksgiving.  Something they should have taught in history class instead of revising what happened to fit our current sensibilities.  But that is another post.
       We know from historic records that the first Thanksgiving featured deer.  Five to be exact, provided by the Wampanoag  We know that it lasted three days.  We know that the same records indicate that four men went on a "fowling" expedition.  We know it was in 1621.
       We do not know what the "fowl" in question were.  We do not know what else was served.  We do not know much else actually.
       We can assume, infer, and suppose many things.  Since the colony was celebrating its first successful corn harvest, it is safe to infer it was on the menu.  Since they were in New England, it is safe to assume that there were clams, oysters, crabs, lobsters, and anything else that could be obtained from the sea.  It is safe to suppose that since sugar would have run out the year before, and the maple syrup that the Wampanoag taught the colonists to make is a springtime thing that there wasn't much sweet presented.  Unless it was provided by the already established Wampanoag.
       So remember when you are giving thanks this Thursday; that the turkey you are eating likely was not a part of the meal.  If it was, it was a small part.  Remember also that the leftovers that last two more days were a part of the first Thanksgiving.  Above all remember that this is the one holiday that unites us all as one people.  All of us American.  All of us feasting, and toasting our good fortunes.  All of us one Nation.  Not half blue and half red, but all Americans, all family.  For a while anyway.

God Bless.


P.S.  Here's a link if you want to do some extra curricular learning.

http://www.history.com/topics/thanksgiving

The growing list of reasons I will never again buy anything made by GM

       My love affair with Buick came when a buddy sold me his '69 LeSabre.  Wrap around bumpers, six and a half feet wide, ugly dead GM green paint.  It had been in an accident and had a side dent as a result.  The windshield was cracked, it smelled like mold and exhaust inside.  That was because the exhaust manifold was also cracked.  The hood needed to have deck pins installed because the current latch, a bungee cord, was worn out.  The engine, I found out after trying, unsuccessfully, to replace the thermostat, was from a '73 Century.  If you want to see it, it looked a lot like the car in "My Hooptie" by Sir Mix-a-lot.  (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKF0o42F7yw)   The rear end looked different on the LeSabre, that one is an Electra.  I loved that hunk of crap.
       When it came time to but my first new car I wanted another Buick.  The one I could afford was a Skylark, '95.  It ran well but certain things were off kilter.  I had to explain to my, then girlfriend-now wife, that the brake trouble light was nothing to worry about.  It went off all the time in wet weather, just turn off the car and restart and it went away.  Also the GM belt noise.  I see some of you nodding your heads.  The thing that bothered me most though came one mid-January day when I had to change a headlamp.
       I went to the local auto parts store, I always went to Murray's back then, and matched up my new headlamp from the computer.  "Oh good" I thought looking at it in the shiny new blister pack, "it's a twist out, five minutes and done."  I see some of you laughing.  Yeah, I found out that day.  See in order to get to the twist out, easy to replace lamp, you needed to remove the battery on one side, or the radiator overflow tank on the other.  So I needed a socket set.  And I froze my sorry butt off because it took about half an hour.
       Years later I owned a GM Sonoma, but was expecting my first child.  My wife did not like the idea of no back seat, so I was looking for a new car.  My brother was working at a dealership at the time and scored me a low mileage trade-in from a retired reporter who lived nearby.  10,000 miles, 10,000 dollars.  Three year old car.  Power everything, and I mean everything.  The passenger seat is six way power adjustable.  I was glad because my last Buick was trouble free for many years except for that idiot headlight.  Surely they had corrected such an egregious oversight in the last six years.  Also the LeSabre is a much larger car, surely they didn't need to compact the components so tightly.
       Tonight I noticed a headlamp out.  Wait for it.  I again got the new one from the store, then attempted to install it in the parking lot.  Twist out, unplug, plug in new, twist in.  Five minutes.  NOPE!  This time they made it so you have to take out the headlamp assembly just to access the lamps.  Please excuse the following caps lock.  HEY GM!  THE ENTIRE POINT OF TWIST OUT COMPONENTS IS QUICK REPLACEMENT!
       Also there is the whole government bailout, and you jerks at GM owe every single American Citizen a free frickin' car of their choice.  But that is another post.